Domestic Abuse Bill UK

Please write to your MP using the letter template below or your own letter

Letter template below, adapted from empathgap.uk RE: Seeking your support for Mr Philip Davies’ amendments to the Domestic Abuse Bill. Original here - http://empathygap.uk/?cat=13  (this is a great site, well worth a look around).

It may be worth adding any personal experience you have.

 

Dear Mr / Ms Your MP's name

I hope that you and your family are keeping well. 

I am writing in regard to the Domestic Abuse Bill that is currently making its way through Parliament. In particular I’m writing respecting the amendments Mr Philip Davies MP, has tabled which I fully support. These amendments seek to ensure that the Bill is not gender specific, supporting male and female victims equally, whilst making children’s best interests paramount. I also believe it would be helpful for balance if the Committee asked to hear the experience of the charity Mankind Initiative in weighing these matters. 

As I am sure you are aware the amendments proposed include: 

1) Extending the definition of domestic abuse to include parental alienation. This is where one parent deliberately alienates a child from the other parent by misrepresentation, causing serious emotional and psychological damage to the child. The Courts’ obligation to put the interests of the child first cannot be fulfilled whilst parental alienation continues to be unrecognised. 

2) Classifying false allegations of domestic abuse as domestic abuse itself. Every year thousands of parents’ lives and reputations are destroyed by malicious allegations. The advantage in court process that such allegations provide to a belligerent ex-partner has made their use endemic, and there is currently no deterrent. By classing false allegations as domestic abuse an essential deterrent would be provided. 

3) Extending the definition of domestic abuse to include child contact obstruction: when one parent deliberately and repeatedly prohibits the other parent’s contact with their children without good reason. At present even court ordered contact arrangements are frequently flouted by one parent and this is done with complete impunity as the Courts fail to enforce their own orders. This brings the whole system into disrepute and denies children one half of their parental support, which is known to hugely exacerbate future disadvantage. 

I ask whether you could offer your support to these amendments in the interests of children and as a way of making the Bill equitable as befits a democratic country with a world reputation for sound justice and protection of the innocent. 

Many thanks in advance and I look forward to hearing from you. 

Yours sincerely,

Your Name

Your Address

 You can find alternative, shorter, specimen letters here.

Domestic Abuse Helpline UK

Deborah Powney had been trying on Twitter to find out whether the 24 hour National Domestic Abuse Helpline run by Refuge directly supports male victims of domestic abuse or not and could clearly state what happen when a man calls. Thankfully this has now been answered  and they simply refer to another helpline for men, this is office hours only not a 24 hour helpline although the one for women is. Unfortunately it is often in the evening and weekends that are the key times that support is required. The next stage is now to highlight the unequal provision of services.

Please write to your MP, to ask them to seek to ensure that there is a 24 hour helpline available to men as well as women when it is most needed and that there is equal service provision on the National Domestic Abuse Helpline.  

If you are a man suffering domestic abuse or a friend, parent, other family member or work colleague please contact one of the following confidential Helplines for men from people who care about providing a service to men.  

England & Wales - Mankind Initiative - https://www.mankind.org.uk/ - 01823 334244  (10-4, Mon-Fri)

Northern Ireland - Men's Advisory Project MAP - http://mapni.co.uk/ - BELFAST. (028) 9024 1929 FOYLE. (028) 7116 0001 E. INFO@MAPNI.CO.UK  

Scotland - Abused Men In Scotland AMIS - https://abusedmeninscotland.org/ - 0808 800 0024 (9-4, Mon-Fri) 

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Kangaroo Courts

One for Australians

For years now, many Australian universities have had secret committees investigating and adjudicating rape. In late 2019, a Queensland Supreme Court case declared this is illegal. The Federal Education Minister Dan Tehan then instructed the university regulator, TEQSA, that universities should leave these crimes to be handled by the criminal courts. 

Bettina has launched a campaign recruiting help from graduates of Australian universities, students, academic staff and parents and grandparents of young people planning to attend university. She’s asking everyone with a university connection to write to Vice Chancellors and Chancellors of that university, alerting them to what has happened and ensuring they comply with the law.

Please get involved to end the Kangaroo Courts on Campuses in Australia. Follow the link and read the TAKE ACTION section for draft letters to send, who to send to and find out what else you can do - https://www.bettinaarndt.com.au/kangaroo-courts/

THANK YOU

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Mothers of Sons

Here is little clip of what Bettina Arndt has to say about 'Mothers of Sons'

Recently I received a letter from a mother whose family has spent the last two years in the criminal courts battling to protect their 16 year-old son from rape accusations. “The police investigation was so biased against our son and completely incompetent,’ she said, explaining that the police didn’t bother checking messages on the girl’s phone which proved the sexual activity was consensual.

.................

I was delighted to be approached recently by a group of mothers who had come together as a result of being connected by me. As mothers of sons who have suffered unfair treatment, they have decided to go public to expose what’s going on here. They are starting a Mothers of Sons website which will showcase their own stories, exposing the real-life experiences being faced by these families. And here are women in a position to offer practical advice – warnings to other mothers about how to protect their sons from a system geared towards persecuting men and boys.

To read more and  to hear how you can help as a mother of sons please visit

https://www.bettinaarndt.com.au/news/mothers-of-sons/

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Giving Books

The idea is to choose and buy a book that sympathetically covers the issues affecting men and boys to send to your MP (or any MPs) either from the book selection on this site or another book that you believe carries the message you hope to convey. Hopefully someone will take a glance at it, it may even be read cover to cover. Also send or give to other people in other walks of life. The media, heads of companies, people who may not have considered men's issues because so far they have been unaffected, I am not just taking about men and boys but mothers, sisters, grand mother, female friends of people having problems in our unfair biased society.

Some suggestions might be:

Men On Strike is an easy flowing read, makes a lot of points very well, it covers a lot of ground and is well referenced.

The War Against Boys, if your interest is education or the person you thought of to send it to is involved in education.

The Myth of Male Power, looks at a broad swathe of injustice in our society against men and boys.

The Empathy Gap, the title highlights exactly where the problem lies, it's a mass of facts and figures to back up arguments or help make a case.

The Way Men Heal perhaps to man grieving a loss of some kind or to some one close to such a person.

12 Rules For Life to any one looking for meaning in life.

Red Pill Psychology for anyone interested in Psychology.  

Sons of Feminism helps the world see through men's eyes.

Daughters of Feminism will fascinate feminists who can't see why not all women are for their cause.

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Surveys

Male Victims of Intimate Partner Violence

There is currently very little information about male victims of Domestic Abuse and so Deborah Powney has prepared a survey for male victims of Intimate Partner Violence. If you are a man who has suffered from Intimate Partner Violence please consider completing the survey at the link below, thank you.

 https://uclan.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_1AMqINPr6D6hiUl 

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Boycotts

How to spend you're or not spend your money to support men and boys right to fairness and appreciation in society. If you know of any that should be included please use the contact page.

First the Boycotts

GILLETTE

The big one to avoid is Gillette products (and if possible all Procter & Gamble products), this has become a totem pole around which men are campaigning and other companies may learn to moderate their hate towards men. It is a product predominantly aimed at men. Why not go one further, when you see a display of razor don't touch the Gillette products but make sure that alternative products can been seen and pull them forward.

MOONPIG 

For sending out warning emails that Father's day is coming up and given customers the chance to opt out of receiving emails from them about it as if they are ashamed of it. They do not do this for Mother's Day. This normalizes the downplaying of Father's Day and Fathers. Disgusting and insensitive to Fathers especially those being alienated and excluded, sometimes Father's Day can be a turning point in contact arrangements, a chance to heal relationships.

Any company, charity or organisation that uses a quota system to favour women in employment and promotion.

Any company that shows men, boys, fathers in a bad light, there is too much of this advertising and it becomes normalised. 

Companies to support

SHERATON HOTELS

Hosts of ICMI 2019 they honoured the booking in the face of warnings from feminists and the event passed successfully.

EGARD WATCHES for male positive advertising.

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Slogans

Equality Under The Law  

Equality Under The Law - A Society To Be Proud Of 

No Two Tier Justice  

Too Many Men In Prison  

Empathy For Men (Too) 

Make Love Not Sex War  

Boys Need Love and their Dads 

End Father Exclusion 

Shared Parenting 

Equal Justice  

Equality in Law 

No More Sexist Shortlists 

Equal Opportunity Motivates Society 

Equal Time For Equal Crime 

Investigate For Truth - It Matters 

Innocent until proven guilty 

Sex crimes need, annominity until proven guilty 

Build a fair society to proud of 

Saving the world starts here

Circumcision my body my choice 

A Foreskin is not just a piece of skin 

Leave Boys Intact